'I am Nothing'

Sri Nisargadatta Maharaj

June 13, 1981

In common spiritual parlance knowledge means repeating what you have heard - presentation of intelligence. They think it is spiritual, but no one tries to find out what he is, does not look at himself. When a boy and girl get married they are intensely interested in each other, similarly, when one gets married to spirituality one is always occupied with thoughts or deliberations concerning spirituality.

Are you the blood flowing inside, are you the skin, the bones? You are not. When you investigate thus and come to understand that you are not the body, you will eliminate everything - whatever you are not. Finally, what will you be? Come to this point.

You are so much addicted to the things which you learn by heart, the rituals, the bhajans, etc., that unless you recite them everyday you will not get any satisfaction of feeling happy.

These ritualistic practices are given for the ignorant, to keep their body-mind busy, but having the body-mind is to know that you are and it has no name or form.

There is no question of pleasure or pain, nor fear of death, for one who understands. If one identifies with the body then one is caught up in the relations related to the body.

My words are few and short, but they are very effective. There are many volumes written about spirituality which do not destroy your concepts but add to them. All the volumes do not tell you what you are.

Q: What is meant by chinmayananda and sat-chit-ananda?

M: People sometimes dance when they sing bhajans, they lose themselves, so that state is called chinmayananda. To have that chinmayananda, the first touch of consciousness is necessary. Ananda means bliss, and this is a quality of mind - a higher realm of the mind - but present in the consciousness. The prerequisite is the kiss of consciousness which is necessary for that highest state of exultation or exhilaration, that is chinmayananda and sat-chit-ananda.

I have come to the firm conclusion that I am nothing. I have no design, no color, I have no image of myself.

In the early morning when the waking state happens, that kiss of beingness appears, vibrant in the entire universe, and vibrating in myself. Also I observe this same thing when I take rest in the afternoon. But if you want to judge me at a physical level, I am not able to lift this pot of water, that is how much strength is left in the body, but that touch of all the vibrant universe - that is the touch of my  I AMness.

I am the knower of Brahman, I am the Brahman jnani, nevertheless, this touch of beingness is misery only.